Friday Five#3

Ehm...

Setelah berminggu-minggu nggak ngisi blog, saya berhutang 5 posting Friday five. Entah kenapa, pasca liburan saya malah lebih rajin nulis di blog puisi dan blog satu lagi. Glek. Yak mari, 4 jum'at sudah terlewati, berarti 4 posting friday five yang masih ngutang (+ 1 posting untuk jum'at ini) akan di recap dan dirangkum dalam 1 posting friday five ini. (Pusing gak sih bacanya? Berasa inception gitu, 1 posting friday five tentang five fridays. Pusing deh.) So, here's my Friday five list!

1. Fiday, Dec 2nd, 2011. Jum'at ini adalah salah satu jum'at super riweuh. Selain kerjaan saya (dan kerjaan patjar) yang sedang menggunung -> nasib dikerjar deadline sebelum vacation, ada beberapa hal yang nggak  sesuai rencana. Misalnya, Patjar supposed to do his final fitting for the tailored suite on this friday, but due to some reason, the tailor delay the fitting til saturday/sunday. Okay, saya mulai panik, takut jas si patjar gak akan beres sebelum kita liburan ke xinjiapo. Baydewey dress saya yang ditambahin lengan juga baru akan selesai hari minggu nya. Yah sutralah... Anyway we were pretty excited since we're about to have our year-end holiday in few days. Yuhuuu!

2. Friday, Dec 9th 2011. The wedding friday! This friday is the day when me, patjar and my HYLI friends follow the procession of Vincent and Sereen's wedding. From the gate crashing (with marvellous superheroes and Superman as our chauffeur) , tea ceremony in both groom and bride's place, first visit to the newly wed apartment - with all white and chic interior - (which looks like just popped out of an interior design magazine. Swear to god it was THAT chic), to the wedding solemnization and reception dinner (Oh how I looove chinese wedding dinner. Food was coming out like crazy :p) . It was a tiring, but a very fun and memorable day! And the best part is that patjar got to meet my HYLI friends and got HYLI approved stamp :p. Oh btw patjar wore his new tailored suit and he looks awesome. I was figuratively drooling over him :p Di hari Jum'at ini, saya dan patjar sudah di xinjiapo semenjak hari rabu, dan baru akan pulang selasa minggu depannya. We had a wonderful time! Kayaknya soal liburan ini perlu posting tersendiri deh, hihi

3. Friday, Dec 16th 2011. Yak, Jum'at yang aneh, imbas efek capek habis liburan dan masuk di tengah minggu dimana di kantor sepi karena pada ikutan training M/LWD di SLB Manggar (in which saya gak bole ikut, karena selain jaga kandang, saya yang notabene mantan M/LWD dianggep sudah khatam dan gak perlu ikut training. nyeh, padahal kan pengen ke base dan curi curi pandang ama patjar yang lagi kerja --> ketauan buruk niatnya:p) . Jum'at ini ada 2 farewell di kantor. Satu acaranya temen baik saya yang resign karena pengen kerja di p****m*na jakarta (dimana saya lupa bawa parting card yang udah di bikin dari rumah, jadi siangnya mesti ke tempat mbak ika untuk numpang bikin parting card :p) , satu lagi adalah acara farewell sekretaris departemen saya yang juga bakal pindah ke Jakarta (ada apa sih dengan Jakarta?? pada pindah kesana semua nampaknya?!) tapi tetep di comapny yg sama. Habis dua acara ini, saya ngibrit untuk ujuan oral di Alliance Francaise (dan belum belajar T_T) J'ai de la chance, I got quite a good total score :p

4. Friday, Dec 23rd 2011. Jum'at dimana kantor nampak seperti kuburan, saking sepinya. (Hampir) semua orang sudah pergi cuti natal/tahun baru dan tinggalah saya dan beberapa orang jaga kandang.  Jum'at ini saya berencana pulang cepet karena si Patjar mau manggung (dan sudah latihan nyanyi dari malemnya) buat acara Jum'at Dahsyat a.k.a JuDas (ampun deh namanya) di SLB Manggar. Si patjar ini aslinya drummer, tapi karena dia sadar drummer kurang dapet jatah difoto, beralihlah dia ke vokalis. Sayangnya, kerjaan saya lagi banyak-banyaknya, jadi saya baru sampai jam 5 dan.....penonton sudah pada bubar. T__T Jum'at ini pun saya pacaran sama kasur, bedcover dan bantal guling karena sehabis nyanyi-nyanyi (dan menang lomba band nya kayaknya), si patjar mesti lembur. Oh, akhirnya saya bisa bermesraan lebih lama sama si kasur empuk...I love my bed (and sleeping), seriously.

5.Friday Dec 30th 2011. Jum'at hari ini, the last friday of the year! Looking back, I have awesome fridays this years. Well, I have an awesome years in a whole. The Big Guy has been so kind to me, my family and patjar and his family this year. Yes, I had my ups and downs, mais c'est la vie... Ujian di tahun ini banyak sekali, tapi pelajaran yang saya dapat lebih banyak lagi. Saya belajar menghadapi ketakutan dan kehawatiran - hantu yang saya ciptakan sendiri. Bahkan di tengah-akhir tahun ini saya belajar mengkonfrontasi masalah dan si penyebab masalah (Yes, you know who you are, and you are forgiven but never forgotten. I am just glad that I had faced you once, and for all). Saya hidup lebih sehat. Saya (mungkin) akan pindah dari log analyst tunu field menjadi petrophysicist data management (yang masih sesekali membantu operational tunu field). Saya punya keluarga yang baik dan patjar  yang membuat hidup saya luar biasa. Hallo 2012, Saya punya harapan yang saya gantungkan tinggi di tahunmu lho ;) Semoga semua lancar, amien. 

That's a five Fridays in Friday five, that's a wrap for this year! Btw saya sedang merencanakan acara tahun baru di balikpapan yang "menyenangkan" ini. Ada beberapa opsi, but definitely me and patjar will have bbq with D&M technicians and FEs, alongside with some friends of ours. Habis itu entah kemana. House of Masquerade, maybe? :p *ngarep*. Anyway, buat yang tinggal di balikpapan, ada 2 spot kembang api (yang sejauh ini saya tahu ya..), yaitu di Balcony city mall dan mall balikpapan baru. Eniwei, Selamat Tahun Baru 2012!  Be good, 2012, Insya Allah :)

Friday Five#2

My week, in recap:

1. Preparation for SG's holiday and Vincent's wedding: Got our IDR exchanged with quite a rate to SGD, Got our new schedule revision (the risk of taking low cost airline - they can change your schedule to a weird hours. Nyeh), Got our itinerary planned and such. The highlight is that Patjar got his new suite tailored and I got my old dress remade. I did accompany him from buying the textile (from an old shop in Pandansari - a good place to shop good stuff with reasonable price in Balikpapan) to choosing the style and details in the tailor. For the price we paid, I think we got ourselves quite a bargain :p. I just can't wait for the final fitting *grin*

2. Just found out that there's gonna be ZoukOut 2011 on Dec 10th. Wow. The wedding will be on 9th and since me+patjar bailed out from watching the wicked musical, then I was thinking...maybe....just maaaybe...we can go to ZoukOut. Gonna be fun! Update: All happy hour tickets are sould out. Our option now are the buying-in-advance ticket or on the spot ticket. Le sigh.

3. One of my closest friend in the office is....*drumroll*...resigning. Third person resigning this year. I am happy for her, though, since she's going to move to Jakarta, working as permanent employee in the national oil company. Well needless to say I'll definitely miss her. She's one of a few people that I can really have a nice, deep, and sometimes out-of-the-box-kind of conversation with. But hey, this means we can go out whenever I go back to Jkt :p. On the other side of the coins, this means more workloads for moi, since the two newbies are still on the training. Ngok.

4. 9GAG is Awesome. Period.

5. Remember the weekend trial for BeneFit Smokin eye palate? I nailed it. Totaly 100% poka-yoke*. So now I can safely bring this for my vacation without worrying that it'd be useless stuff that eats up my baggage space. Err, I'm a packing OCD. Even a small adding space for eye shadow set (that used to be predicted  as useless stuff) can worry me.

And to close this FF post, I present you, courtesy from 9gag that somehow is.. so me.

Exactly. 

*Poka-yoke is a Japanese term for fail-proofing, used in Lean. Guess how did I know this? Yes, my ME boyfriend gave me a Lean lecture (from the types of waste to the Poka-yoke) while I was doing my smoky eyes trial. Guess how geeky cool is that? 

Next, Patjie?

Hey...

Aku ingin mengajakmu ke Ubud.
Menikmati tenang rintik di dua cangkir teh hangat yang diseruput
Menghela udara di sawah saat matahari terbit, lalu bersepeda bersamamu menuju arah kicau burung
Menyandarkan diri pada bahumu sambil bercerita
(mungkin mencoba ikut kelas yoga)
Menikmati cafe dan dansa, serta gelak tawa
Dan membiarkan malam menyelimuti kita dengan haru cinta

Lain kali,
(Jika ada rezeki),
Aku ingin sekali mengajakmu kesana.
Berdua.
Boleh
Ya?

(Late) Fascination

Each of my female (and male) friend know that I am not at all a make-up person. I was working on oilfield before, and by all means since there's only a few of female worker on the rig (usually just me and a female geologist) therefore I used to dress in the most decent way, trying not to draw any attention at all. Well, my blue coverall was definitely unattractive anyway. The only face product I used back then is a sunblock lotion and lip butter (my lips chopped easily) , and somehow this doesn't get better once I gave up my field job and move to the office-based operation. My daily put-ons are just loose powder. No face lotion or face foundation, no blush on, no eye shadows and such. Well, I use a lip-and-cheek tint from time, but only If either I'm not lazy or I don't forget to use one. Somehow I feel that my sleeping time is precious and I wont sacrifice 5-10 minutes only to put on some silly make up. Le Sigh, I know.

This doesn't mean I'm not interested in make up, though. I just feel that make up is like a toy - you need to dedicate sometime to play on with it, to reveal the fun and to master it. Soooo.....I'm gonna dedicate a time this weekend to play with this :

Tergoda beli di sini

Mwahahahahhahahaha! *it's a panic laugh - don't be fooled*  - my 2nd make up buying, after quite a while. My female besties must be proud of me :p

This look fool-proof for me, so a clueless chick like me should be able to put it on no? Well, let's see whether this can change me pale, flat eyes into a smokin' one.

And no, (in case you wonder), I'm still not ready to gave up my daily extra 5-10 minutes sleeping time to put on some make up. Yet.

Jadi, Januari.

Januari, be nice ya...

Alhamdulillah, thanks a bunch Big Guy :). Semoga semua dilancarkan jalannya, semoga dimudahkan, semoga semua yang diharapkan bisa pelan pelan terwujud, Amin. Slowly, but sure, dearie..

Et pour toi, merci beaucoup. Je crois en toi, mon cher :).

and oh...

J'ai de la chance :)

The Friday Five!

Yihaaa! Akhirnya nulis the friday five! Apa itu friday five? saya nyontek dari blognya mbak Laila yang ternyata juga terinspirasi dari blog temennya, dan si pencetus asli dari gerakan the friday five itu adalah blog the friday five ini. What a sweet family :) . Jadi, the friday five adalah recap 5 hal tentang kejadian seminggu ini, yang ditulis pada hari jum'at. Si Lima Jum'at lah kalo mau diterjemahin. Ide ini buat saya amat menyegarkan karena, well, saya adalah si penulis malas. Friday Five ini bisa jadi topik yang membuat ada postingan baru di blog saya paling gak seminggu sekali.

So here goes my friday five list:

1. I've been drinking water healthily for the whole weeks. Gara-garanya, minggu sebelumnya saya sakit  aneh di perutdi kanan bawah. Curiganya sih asam lambung saya yang udah parah, dan dasar saya males, memutuskan untuk gak ke dokter. Tapi si patjar siaga insist kalo saya mesti ke internist malem itu juga . Hasilnya? Bukan cuma si maag dan asam lambung, tapi saya diduga infeksi saluran kencing. Widiw. Pas med check terakhir siy memang ada dugaan yang sama, tapi dasar saya ndablek, saya diemin. Yah, mungkin ini cara Yang Diatas ngasih tahu saya untuk minum air secara teratur dan lebih ngejaga badan. Sama si dokter baikhati cuma dikasi antibiotik plus disuruh minum air putih yang cukup, kalo dalam tiga hari nggak membaik disuruh balik. Alhamdulillahnya, saya nggak mesti balik kesana. Oh iya, ternyata ada rumus intake air minimum yang mesti kita minum per hari nya lho! Jadi untuk rentang usia  25-55 tahun, intake air putih per hari adalah 35mL/kg Berat badan. Jadi tinggal dikalikan saja, misal berat : 60kg, intake minimum air putih per harinya adalah 35ml x 60 kg=2100 ml. 

2. Saya ngasih kejutan boneka crocodile (tepatnya, si Louie dari film disney, princess and the frog). Well, he's been wanting to have a crocodile doll for quite a long time tapi takut dibilang gak macho. Dan pas weekend kemarin jalan jalan ke Gramedia dan liat si buaya, me and patjar thought that the doll has hillarious expression. Tapi lagi lagi, si patjar meragu. yaudahlah senen siang nya saya beliin :p. And guess what, he loves it *fiuhh*

Penampakan patjar+si buaya delta mahakam :p

3. My baby sister got her 1st job!! She got accepted as a trainee logistic in one of Japanese company. All I can say is that Alhamdulillah, I am a proud sister ^^. Welcome to the club, sis! Pas denger berita ini dari orang tua saya, entah kenapa saya pengen sujud syukur saat itu juga. Si adik kecil akhirnya akan mulai merasakan dunia kerja dan semua intrik-intriknya! Jadi pengen ngajak doi jalan-jalan weekend ini buat nyari office attire deh! *alesan mau blanja*

4. Mom+Dad went to Blitar for my cousin's wedding. Orangtua saya ini usianya sudah tergolong senior, tapi teteeeeep...kalo soal jalan-jalan berdua gak terkalahkan. And what I'm saying is not the-kind-of-comfy-luxury-travelling, tapi travelling naik kereta dan bis. Masya Allah, gimana saya gak khawatir?!?! tapi mereka mah tetep santai..dan beneran berangkat pakai kereta api. T_T Untung setelah dirayu rayu, pulang ke Jakarta nya mereka mau pake pesawat (ermm..tetep pulangnya naik bis dari Blitar  ke Surabaya siy, lalu naik pesawat dari Surabaya. Hadeuh...). Itu juga rasanya karena saya bakal pulang ke Jakarta weekend ini. Ampun...jiwa mudanya gak terkalahkan mereka mah! Semoga aja sepulangnya dari nikahan si sepupu  saya gak ditanya tanya "Kapan?. Amin. *CrossingFinger*

5. Saya (dan patjar) akan menghabiskan weekend+2 di Jakarta. Di rumah masing-masing tentunya. Semoga tahun depan sudah bisa sah bareng-bareng kemana-mana ya patjsky, Amien. ;) Anyhoo agenda pulang kali ini agak hectic. Saya mau nengokin baby Nikha di Buaran, plus jalan-jalan sama adek adek dan sepupu sepupu...makanya lagi cari mall yang baby friendly tapi saya tetep bisa ngeceng. Halah. Habis itu, kalo sempet dan kalo gak penuh  saya pengen potong rambut dan make over rambut. So far pilihannya either Irwan team di GI atau OnePiece salon yang happening itu. Kalo dua-duanya penuh ya back to Tony and Guy di PS :p. Tapi agenda paling penting dari pulang kali ini adalah.....................jeng jeng...... bayar pajak tahunan STNK sodara-sodara. Nasib punya plat B di Balikpapan..mesti pulang pergi ngurus pajaknya. Oh iya, selama di Jekarda juga pengen ngeteh cantik sama besties neng Ve yang bakal transfer ke Tunisie dan bumil Putri, plus genk gonk lainnya. Semoga bisaaa!

Ps: Reminder to self - cek kapan si Lista (kucing kami) mesti disuntik kb lagi. Daripada tiba2 hamidun dan ketanggungan kittens yang gak sanggup rawatnya?!

Holding my breath and hoping...

Me and patjaw are gonna spend this weekend + 2 weekdays at home. Anything can happen. But I'm crossing my finger and pray, so that what we've wanted can manifest into words, or better, actions. I know we're stepping slowly but sure. Like patjaw said, it's a bumpy road already, so the least we can do is to make it as comfortable as possible for both of us.

Big Guy, I know that You know. I know that You've got it all planned already. I know that You want me to learn to be patient, to be persistent, and to master the art of waiting :)

Danke Schatz..

Terimakasih ya bibsky,

For the effort last night..
For still being cautious and taking me to the internist when I insisted that I don't need one
For driving me there and back home..and for bearing with my over-sensitive over-demanding self
For being there through my bad times and say no word about it
For making me promise that I will take a good care of myself regardless anything
For being mad but yet still, full of love and attention
For being you.

:')
 Wov Pacawsky... So much

Berita Pagi ini

...adalah si Patjar di approve school MENG-3 nya di Houston. Untungnya kali ini trainingnya gak lama-lama banget , sekitar 2 minggu. Sedih dikit siy tadi pagi, tapi gak boleh cengeng. Lagian masih April tahun depan, and I have him all year long this year anyway :p Well, will be missing him a LOT, but also won't miss a chance to get some paper crafting tools from US this time! Patjaaar, siap-siap bawaannya banyak ya!! hihihi!

The Good Ol' Tumblr of Mine...

...is back to life!! Blimey and my new toy Galaxy s2, I can't stop taking picture and editing it. Enjoy the pics at greenygreedy.tumblr.com! Ciao!

Disclaimer: Tolong jangan eneg kalo liat banyak banget foto si Patjar, foto kucing dan foto saya bertebaran :p

Countdown

1 Month to go to our December trip!!!! Can't can't can't wait. Me and Patjar haven't had a decent holiday (except for Ied, for sure, but that's with family) and Vincent's wedding on xinjiapo this December is just a perfect moment for us to have a holiday trip! It's gonna be fun since we're gonna spend it with my HYLI malaysian friends and some of Patjar's ENG 1 friend (if they're not at the rig...crossing finger...) The itsy bitsy for lodging is done (yes, we're doing it in backpacker's style) , gift for the wedding is on its way, and itineraries are planned already. The complete Malaysian HYLI will be coming from KL and Ariff+wifey will be flying from down under. I am now hoping that John or Glenn can make it from manila so we'll have the Pinoy HYLI (since it'd be quite impossible to fly in Donald or Wain+wifey from US). Ah..another wedding reunion for me and my HYLI friends :)

On the side of the dish, I am finishing my two short stories, submitted to NBC Balikpapan (Nulis Buku Club Balikpapan). Writing fiction has never been my strong side, but I thought I'll just give it a shot, and ended up with two pieces . One is inspired by a poem I wrote couple years back, the other one is inspired by a side story in a manga I read back when I was a kid. This whole writing thingy makes me kinda nervous, actually, considering how I never show my piece of writings to other people (besides poems, of course. But poems is entirely different stories from usual fiction). It's 2 days before deadline and I've submitted mine already. Hope the NBC folks will like it. Hope they wont be harsh in giving feedbacks. Hope that this can be a stepping stone for me to start write fiction :D

In a wrap, November in Balikpapan will be windy and gloomy, with some kicks of rain, but just like Patjar said, warmth is something that begin at heart :) Have a nice November !

When you asked me..

..whether I would support your decision for this future-career related thingy, what can I say except that I got your back?

Needless to say that I'll go wherever it is with you, as long as we're together. :)

The recycler

I think that's how I'm gonna call meself. The Recycler. Gara gara hobi cartonage dan paper craft saya, akhir-akhir ini saya jadi hobi ngumpulin kertas dan ornamen. Dan ini beneran "ngumpulin", mulai dari beli kertas karton, kain felt, kain katun motif, pernak pernik ornamen, sampai ke minta-minta kertas bekas dan ornamen. Yes, saya rajin nodong ke kolega saya, meminta undangan-undangan perkawinan yang sudah lama teronggok di meja dan siap dibuang. Believe it or not, kertas undangan hard paper itu bagus kalo di recycle. Hasilnya? Well let's say I have quite a bunch of stock for box and frame craft making berupa setumpuk hard paper dari undangan keren dari karton tebel, plus pernak pernik pita pitanya. Prinsip saya, hal-hal yang kadang ingin kita buang, sebenarnya kalau dioalah dengan benar, bisa menjadi sesuatu yang baru dan berguna.

Beberapa hari yang lalu saya ditelpon seorang kolega kantor, untuk datang ke ruangannya dan mengambil setumpuk undangan perkawinan yang siap di recycle (Soalnya tadinya mau dibuang aja, menuh-menuhin ruangan, katanya). My heart jumps in excitement, hihihi! Pas ada seorang kolega ulang tahun dan dibawakan kue tart dari b***d t**l, saya juga mengambil alas kuenya dan pita plus kardus pembungkus (yang tebal) nya sebelum mereka dicampakkan ke tempat sampah. Another case? Saat rapat dengan kontraktor dan si kontraktor ini membawa kue kue dalam nampan berhias korsase pita bungan yang unyu, mata saya yang biasanya bakal langsung tertuju ke si kue kue itu, sekarang tidak lagi berminat pada kue beralih ke si korsase pita, yang saya tahu akan dicampakkan ke tong sampah setelah semua orang memakan kue nya. And yap, saya memilih untuk menyelamatkan si korsase dulu, baru memakan (tiga) kue di nampan itu. Tetep rakus. Tadi pagi, saya juga "menyelamatkan" beberapa set styrofoam dan ornamen balon dan daun dari sebuah birthday cake. Those ornament will be useful for the  box/frame/greeting card making in the future. And believe it or not, saya yang tukang makan ini, lebih fokus ke misi "penyelamatan" ornamen dibanding ke kue tartnya. Sigh. I am officially a recycler now.

Weekend Regulars...

Movie Date - Narsis Sebelum nonton

Pacar's Futsal League (and me foto foto)

Grocery Session : Beli Odol!

And how I end my sunday ...

Rush data tunu shallow in the office...

I guess, in a wrap, it's quite a good weekend, ey?

The Expiration Date

Saya percaya, semua benda di dunia ini punya expiration date tag . Entah itu benda mati maupun benda hidup.  Seperti semua makanan di supermarket yang akan kadaluarsa sampai tanggal tertentu, seperti semua material yang punya fatigue point, seperti semua barang yang pada satu poin akan pecah/patah/rusak/hilang. Fana. Dan kita tak lepas dari semua itu. Kita punya tenggat waktu kita. Bedanya, kita tidak bisa melihat si cap kadaluwarsa kita sendiri. Cuma The Big Guy yang tahu, dan yang men"cap" kan  expiration date tag itu ke setiap diri kita. Mungkin, karena tag yang tidak terlihat itu, terkadang kita lupa bahwa waktu kita terbatas.

Sungguh, saya punya ketakutan sendiri terhadap si expiration date ini. Saya takut akan kematian, saya takut orang orang tercinta saya pergi, dan saya bisa super sedih ketika ada seseorang yang meninggal dunia. Saya bisa menangis tersedu saat burung kecil terluka yang saya temukan di parkiran, mati di genggaman saya. Saya bisa spanneng, morose dan shock mendengar kabar kehilangan. Seperti pagi ini, saat ada berita tentang seorang teman yang kehilangan belahan jiwanya. Teman saya ini, seorang ibu dengan bayi kecil, kehilangan dua orang tercintanya dalam satu tahun berturut turut. Saya bayangkan, mungkin saya tidak akan bisa sekuat dia bila berada di posisinya sekarang. She is a strong, tough fighter that I'll always look up to. That I'll always pray for. Dan bahkan saat saya mengetik postingan ini, tangan saya masih terasa dingin. Saya takut.

Saya takut kehilangan. Saya takut waktu yang saya punya, tidak cukup banyak untuk saya habiskan untuk hidup,mewujudkan mimpi, dan bahagia bersama orang yang saya cintai. Saya takut karena saya tidak bisa melihat  expiration date tag saya. Keterbatasan waktu dan takut akan kehilangan. Sampai si dearie a.k.a pacar tercinta, orang yang saya paling takut kehilangan dia, berkata;

" Kamu mesti siap sama hal-hal kaya gini. Kehilangan, musibah, it happens every time, and it will happen. Sama siapapun. Tanpa kecuali. Semua orang, aku, kamu. Kalau sudah waktunya, nggak ada yang bisa dilakukan. Tapi semua mesti dan akan terus berjalan "

I have to admit he is right again. Ya kalau sudah waktu sudah mencapai hitungan yang sama dengan yang tertera di  expiration date tag kita, tidak ada yang bisa dilakukan oleh manusia. Tapi, saya juga ingat bagaimana pacar terus terusan mensugesti saya untuk tidak terlalu tenggelam pada ketakutan dan kekhawatiran tentang hal hal yang belum terjadi. Karena untuk apa membuang waktu, yang terbatas dan begitu berharga untuk tenggelam pada kenegatifan? Kalaupun memang musibah itu terjadi, so be it. Mau tidak mau, hidup akan terus berjalan. Kita juga mesti terus berjalan. Dan waktu, buat saya, sangat berharga. Karena ia terbatas, karena kita semua memiliki cap kadaluwarsa. Dan dalam keterbatasan itu, dalam keberhargaan itu, saya memutuskan untuk menikmati hidup. Bersama ketakutan dan kekhawatiran saya, dan mencoba untuk berdamai dengan diri saya sendiri. For the no matter how short, or long, remaining time that I have, I am thankful that I  live. That I have my beloved family, and of course, my dearest dearie Marfan, by my side. That I, am trying my best to make the best of my time, and be happy in it. 

Saya jadi ingat, satu satunya saat dimana saya tidak merasa tegang, takut ataupun khawatir ketika peristiwa kematian, adalah ketika Eyang putri saya wafat. Kala itu, saya sedih. Saya baru saja terpilih menjadi delegasi Indonesia untuk sebuah forum internasional. Saya ingin bercerita padanya, memperlihatkan foto foto dan souvenir dari foruum itu, dan masih banyak lagi. Dan ia sudah harus dipanggil Ilahi. Tapi entah kenapa, wajah damai eyang saya seakan berkata, bahwa ia tahu ini adalah saatnya untuk pulang pada Penciptanya. Dan dari semua kerabat dan keluarga besar yang datang, yang mengenangnya dengan doa dan senyuman, saya tahu sesuatu. It felt so peaceful because maybe, she knew, she made the best of her time already. She had raised marvellous family. Her children has been having beautiful life,  beautiful families. She was proud to her children and grand children. She knew she did fine with her remaining time. And when the time set to her expiration date, she was ready to leave. Saya mengantarkan Eyang putri tercinta dari mulai disemayamkan, pengajian, hingga saat ia turunkan ke makam. I saw everything, every details. I was confused because I did feel sad, but didn't feel scared and worried. Justru, sedikit banyak saya merasakan ketenangan. Sedih yang menenangkan. Saya harap, Eyang Putri saya merasakan ketenangan yang sama ketika ia harus pergi.....

October is....

...somewhat unproductive, blog-wise. I got a new toy. Oh well, the old BB is way too..fragile for me. The software hung for thousand times, the keyboard was officially not working, and once in a morning it just....dead. Hah. So me and pacar decided that bbm is passée, and we wont use BB any longer. Well a few days before my BB dead, me and pacar had a very nice coincidence when we both were head over heals for galaxy s2 for days, and suddenly bumped into the promotion counter with special credit card offer and price reduction. Yum. So yeah, October  has been somewhat unproductive in regards to blog posts. I am waaaaay too busy searching cool apps on android market and playing with my new toy. Enuff said :D

Anyhoo, I am glad that I'll get to spend 5 days in Jakarta next months regardless my parents will only be at home for 3 days. Well, there's tax to be paid, things to be done and if The Big Guy is kind enough to me (please...), then some things and events might, just might, take their course and run smoothly, Amin.Well He knows the best for me and His time is the best timing. Oh well. Trying to lighten up a bit here :p And I am definitely ecstatic for the December trip. Can't wait to meet fellow HYLIans in our yearly wedding reunion (Sounds weird but we do meet up every year in a wedding. 2008 was Renee's, 2009 was Wainwright's, 2010 was Ariff's, and this year's gonna be Vincent's. 2012 will be John's, and...me? well it's up to The Big Guy. Your timing, God, not mine :). Anyway holiday! Always excited to meet up with old friends and spend the night over coffee (tea for me) and good talks!!!Uwyeah! 

Work-wise, October had me work my ass off. Some good things happened, some bad things as well. C'est la vie, C'est le travail. Pacar said I learn best from mistakes I made, so yeah. When the going gets tough, the tough gets going :)

To close this random post, lemme put some pic from papercamera, one of the apps in my new toy ;p

the tidy corner in my workspace

Tunu PTR room with the team leader facing my desk

My friendly neighbour busy at work

Ps: This October, some dearest people to my heart and Pacar's heart are having birthday. For My lovely sis and cousin, Pacar's parent and nephew, dearest friends and relatives, Happy birthday, October peoples :)

For a bookworm like me, this Quote is heart warming :)

"Date a girl who reads. Date a girl who spends her money on books instead of clothes. She has problems with closet space because she has too many books. Date a girl who has a list of books she wants to read, who has had a library card since she was twelve.

Find a girl who reads. You’ll know that she does because she will always have an unread book in her bag.She’s the one lovingly looking over the shelves in the bookstore, the one who quietly cries out when she finds the book she wants. You see the weird chick sniffing the pages of an old book in a second hand book shop? That’s the reader. They can never resist smelling the pages, especially when they are yellow.

She’s the girl reading while waiting in that coffee shop down the street. If you take a peek at her mug, the non-dairy creamer is floating on top because she’s kind of engrossed already. Lost in a world of the author’s making. Sit down. She might give you a glare, as most girls who read do not like to be interrupted. Ask her if she likes the book.

Buy her another cup of coffee.

Let her know what you really think of Murakami. See if she got through the first chapter of Fellowship. Understand that if she says she understood James Joyce’s Ulysses she’s just saying that to sound intelligent. Ask her if she loves Alice or she would like to be Alice.

It’s easy to date a girl who reads. Give her books for her birthday, for Christmas and for anniversaries. Give her the gift of words, in poetry, in song. Give her Neruda, Pound, Sexton, Cummings. Let her know that you understand that words are love. Understand that she knows the difference between books and reality but by god, she’s going to try to make her life a little like her favorite book. It will never be your fault if she does.

She has to give it a shot somehow.

Lie to her. If she understands syntax, she will understand your need to lie. Behind words are other things: motivation, value, nuance, dialogue. It will not be the end of the world.

Fail her. Because a girl who reads knows that failure always leads up to the climax. Because girls who understand that all things will come to end. That you can always write a sequel. That you can begin again and again and still be the hero. That life is meant to have a villain or two.

Why be frightened of everything that you are not? Girls who read understand that people, like characters, develop. Except in the Twilightseries.

If you find a girl who reads, keep her close. When you find her up at 2 AM clutching a book to her chest and weeping, make her a cup of tea and hold her. You may lose her for a couple of hours but she will always come back to you. She’ll talk as if the characters in the book are real, because for a while, they always are.

You will propose on a hot air balloon. Or during a rock concert. Or very casually next time she’s sick. Over Skype.

You will smile so hard you will wonder why your heart hasn’t burst and bled out all over your chest yet. You will write the story of your lives, have kids with strange names and even stranger tastes. She will introduce your children to the Cat in the Hat and Aslan, maybe in the same day. You will walk the winters of your old age together and she will recite Keats under her breath while you shake the snow off your boots.

Date a girl who reads because you deserve it. You deserve a girl who can give you the most colorful life imaginable. If you can only give her monotony, and stale hours and half-baked proposals, then you’re better off alone. If you want the world and the worlds beyond it, date a girl who reads.

Or better yet, date a girl who writes."

Rosemarie Urquico 

 

I smile ear to ear when I read this, for a silly reason that I know the sentiment of how joyful reading (and writing) can be :). For those who care to read the witty response to this quote, read this blog. Quite amusing yet still very honest.

 

The doppelgänger

While I'd rather avoid having contact or whatsoever means of communication, due to her nature, with one..  

I found the other one as a teacher, a friend and a very bohemian soul that I can easily relate myself to.

It's funny to find two person I know that looks alike (yet not  having any relationship by blood) and it's funnier to find how unalike they are in their life.

Current obsession

Sigh. Instead of bag, shoes or clothes, my current obsession lately lingers on embossing tool, die cuts, fancy paper  etcetera. Awalnya gara gara mengunjungi neng desy di suatu malam untuk iseng iseng lihat card making nya dia (dan berujung pada bikin kartu ulang tahun sebagai compliment untuk frame saya). Pas saya lihat koleksi kerta, stam, puncher , pernak pernik dan kreasi kartunya si neng satu ini, I felt like I just died and gone to card heaven *lebay*. Desy mengjari saya berbagai teknik stamping, punching dan embossing. Saya asik mainan stamping up sampai gak sadar udah jam setengah sebelas malam dan dijemput sama si pacar. Card making is a whole lot of fun!  Plus, I think the stamping, embossing, and whatever-the-name-of-the-technique-are will add some spark, values and uniqueness on my new-found cartonage crafting activity. Imagine a frame or box, or even invitation with personalized emboss and vintage design that is created handmade. Pour moi, c'est super yumm :p. 

Semenjak malam itu, saya entah kenapa kepikiran terus soal card making ini. Then I google and found some interesting sites, some sites display personal artwork on card making, some sites reviews on tools and kits, and some sites sell the tools and supplies. And this last kind of site, is the one which makes me drool.Try visit this site or this, this or even this. Gulp. Rasanya pengen borong itu semua stamps, puncher, emboss dkk dkk. Kalap banget. Kalo gak inget cicilan mobil etc rasanya pengen klik add to shopping cart saat itu juga deh. Tapi ya, delivery ke Indo dari USA kan pricey, hiks... That is why I just got my YAY moment when I found out that BigShot, one of Sizzix 's machine, is available on a papercraft store in Xinjiapo. Daaaan itu berarti pas liburan december besok bisa menyelinap ke toko toko lucu buat beli kertas+tool ditengah tengah itinerary yang disusun si pacar. Hihihi. Wait, tapi harganya kok lebih murah dan dapet value pack kalo pesen ke Sizzix USA sih? Apa titip aja ke temen temen yang pada mau training kesana ya ??

Ini penampakan si bigshot machine. Image taken from here

Winisphere box and cards project

Hihi, maapkeun jarang ngeblog akhir akhir ini. Bahkan belum sempat minal-minul alias minta maaf dalam rangka idul fitri di blog ini (yaelah, perasaan moment nya udah lewat banget..). jadi apa kabar hidup? Yah, tipikal liburan idul fitri dimana semua orang nanya "kapan?", rafting ke citarik sama keluarga, lalu balik lagi ke balikpapan buat kerja (dan pacaran :p. hayah). Some good (and not) friends got married, some friends resigned and move away, and so on and so forth. Well intinya changes happens constantly as it always does in life. 

Akhir- akhir ini saya lagi ketularan virus cartonage alias kreasi karton dari mbak ika, istrinya kolega kantor saya. She's a creative goddess, beneran deh. Masuk ke studio nya aja saya udah amazed duluan sama dekorasi pernak perniknya yang unik. Belom lagi skill per-karton-an nya. To make long story short, saya beberapa minggu selalu menyatroni studionya si mbak ini pas lunch time buat belajar dan makan gratis. Well, saya selalu berpendapat ilmu apapun itu pasti berguna kedepannya, dan semoga si cartonage ini juga ya. 

The first trial was a simple small box. Working hour : 8 hrs. yah, namanya juga pemula... *malu*

Penampakan si box + hand tools yang dipakai

Penampakan si box di meja kerja..

The second thing I made was a standing double frame. Working hour : 6 hours. Tingkat kesulitannya sama si box sebelumnya beda, karena disini saya juga pakai kain untuk "baju" luar frame nya. Tadinya ini saya bikin buat si pacar biar bisa naro foto di meja kerjanya, tapi ternyata salah satu kolega kantor saya (cowo) yang lagi mencari kado buat ulang tahun tunangannya, dan si kolega ini menyukai frame bikinan saya. Well, yasudahlah saya jual saja si standing frame itu (Plus kartu ulang tahun yang saya bikin bersama desy, seorang teman yang mengenalkan racun baru no. 2 : paper crafting and stamping). Hihihi.. lumayan buat nambah nambah modal...

Tampak dalam si frame

Tampak luar si frame

Kreasi ketiga saya (dengan working hour: 2 hours) adalah sebuat parting card dadakan untuk farewell seorang kolega di petrophysic. Dibuat dengan bahan kain+pita dan karton saja, ini dia penampakan si parting card dadakan (sayang nggak keliatan dalamnya, padahal ada ucapan "wishing all the best" yang di bikin timbul :p)

Penampakan si parting card dadakan..

Hyuk. Jadi bye bye belanja online , say hi ke toko kain-kertas-pita dan alat-alat card making. ^^

They are the reasons.....

For every struggle, every thrive

For every fight..

For my life.

The Makeover...

from this...

to this..

Heuu.. Pas acara Make Over nya Estee Lauder di Singapore tahun lalu itu, saya lagi kurus kurusnya...ngoook..pengen kurus lagi, pengen make over lagi *haisyah*

Ubud

Tiba-tiba rasanya ingin sedikit menenagkan diri dan hati, menyepi ke suatu tempat yang hijau...
Tiba-tiba, ingin liburan ke Ubud :)

..tinggal di guest house murah selama beberapa hari, sewa sepeda, keliling sawah, biking , hiking, ikut kelas yoga dan meditasi, makan makanan veggies dan ramah lingkungan, ikut kelas masak, rafting, menghirup udara segar.. *dan ke cafe salsa yang tersohor disana :p*


..Semoga ada rizkinya.. :)

Mangrove Forest#2

Ini adalah stok foto foto di hutan Mangrove, Balikpapan... Enjoy! Photo courtesy of Putri+Barry

Si patjar sangat...Ji Hoo Sunbae..*blush*

Tinggal ditambahin Geum Jan Di ngintip dari jauh..

Tapi kok yang nengok bukan geum jan di?? Jan Di kan gak main saxo??

Hehe, saya kaya'  Soo yi jung versi wanita *ngarep*

*saya suka foto ini*

Maaf ya, caption-caption foto diatas sangat..err..film korea sekali. Abisnya biarpun udah jamanentahkapan, menurut saya BBF itu seri yang oke. Saingannya sampai sekarang baru Secret garden (tapi priapria cakepnya masih jauh dibanding BBF..kecuali si Martial Art School director di secret garden). Maaf ya, yang roaming bacanya :p

Mangrove Forest, once upon a (quite) rainy day

As we travel through our way

Once or twice, our sky would be quite grey

But it's the laughter in your face

That would always color my day

Photo courtesy of Putri &Barry 

PR nya adalah....

...belajar masalah RD..

...cari tahu soal ILM..

dan dibandingkan mana yang paling feasible dan tepat-guna untuk saat ini. Bismillah, kalau sudah mantap, harus segera dilaksanakan (daripada nanti alokasinya terpakai untuk yang lain-lain).

...Financial check up..

...menentukan tujuan yang jelas..

dan lalu membuat comprehensive financial planning. And START doing it instead of daydreaming about itsy bitsy unimportant stuffs. 

*sigh* *dadah dadah ke online shopping*.

Insya Allah kalo PR nya beres, semoga lebih dimudahkan menuju 'kesana', ya bubsky? Amin :)

Kalau ada yang nggak nyambung ini posting soal apa, maapkeun ya... Inspirasi dari : sini , sini, dan sini .. Juga dari sini. Yuk marii

Weekend adalah...

...mencuci si item... (me+kowalsky membawa si item ke tempat cuci maksudnya)

...masak chicken kiev buat buka bareng si kowalsky (nama panggilan baru si patjar) - doakan semoga berhasil eksperimennya..

..Main DoTA sama kowalsky..latihan pake demon witch (which is susye ya, dibanding pake snipper. Tapi saya pengen yang keren dan warna warni jurus-jurusnya)...

...Main sama si Lista (Yang masi aneh gara-gara pas di grooming kemarin, dia di de-clawed. Poor girl..)

..Dan yang penting : Tidur sampe siang. *ketauan kebo*. Yuks maree. Bon Weekend!

Jadwal Imsakiyah Balikpapan dan Sekitarnya - 1432H

Ramadhan Kareem :)

The picture

Jadi ceritanya, pas kemarin ke Malang dalam rangka married-an nya putri , karena dari akad (Jam 7-8:30 pagi) ke acara resepsi (11:30-14:30) ada jeda waktu yang lumayan lama dan saya+patjar dearie nggak ngerti mesti ngapain dan kemana selama nunggu, jadilah kami (ehm, atas ide saya) iseng foto ke salah satu studio foto yang udah lama di rekomendasiin si putri. Nama studionya The beverly hills. And it turns out to be quite a challenge. Mulai dari segala kekacauan nyari tempatnya (yang tadinya di Araya dan udah pindah ke Jl.Kalimantan), sampe nego via telpon sama si fotografernya. Karena ternyata yaaaa, mesti booking H-1 untuk sesi foto (mesti janjian dulu sama periasnya) Nah karena saya udah di make up dari jam 7 pagi, jadi gak usah pake make up lagi lah ya, tinggal gegayaan dan difoto aja. Setelah nego-nego, si mbak fotografer baikhati nya menyanggupi request dadakan kami. Jam 10 teng mulai sesi foto, mbak fotografernya mau rapih-rapih dulu katanya :p. Saya+patjar dearie sudah standby dari jam 9:30 setelah hampir sejam muter-muter keliling malang nyari lokasinya. Jam 10 pas kita mulai, dan mbak Dian, fotografernya, super ramah dan supel. Kami yang banci foto ini jadi gak malu-malu gaya dan jadi lebih relaks (Plus kehadiran kaca segede dinding didepan, jadi bisa tau pose -> AMAT membantu ;p). 45 menit photo session terasa amat kurang cukup. Baru kemarin (2 weeks, as they promised), kami dapat kiriman soft copy+fotonya, dalam packaging yang rapih dan safe. And we're satisfied :) Enough said, here's the teaser picture...

My favourite pic...

Dan ini foto yang (saya harap) nanti bisa berguna *ehem* *wink*.. Amiiiinnnn... 

Happy happy !! Ayo kita kumpulkan couple picture biar prewednya murah...!!

The beauties in our own backyards...

If you think these pictures are somewhere in Hawaii,  Thailand or Maldives, or even Caribbean beaches and dive resorts..

....then you're completely wrong :). From top to bottom, they are:

Pic 1 & 2 : Raja Ampat, Papua, Indonesia. Picture taken from here

Pic 3 & 4 : Wakatobi Island, Sulawesi, Indonesia. Picture taken from here

Pic 5 : The famous Bunaken, Sulawesi, Indonesia . Picture taken from here

Pic 6 : Beaches on Pulau Weh, Indonesia. Picture taken from here

Pic 7 & 8 : Moyo Island, NTT, Indonesia. Picture taken from here

Pic 9 &10: Derawan Island, Borneo, Indonesia. Picture taken from here

Pic 11: Sabang, Aceh, Indonesia. Picture taken from here

Pic 12: Belitong, Sumatra, Indonesia. Picture taken from here

Pc 13:  Mentawai, Indonesia. Picture taken from here

And these are just a small few beautiful beaches from Indonesia, an archipelago country  of 17.508 islands, 6000 of them are inhibited. Go figure how many beaches, diving spots, and surfing spots there are across this country. Go figure how many hidden paradise, waiting to be discovered. Go figure how much potency we have for beach tourism, eco-tourism and resorts.For me, the possibility to find beauties in our own country's backyards seems endless. 

In my "next-to-go" list, probably visiting Bunaken is the most feasible one. Soon... *Crossing finger*

Notes: Why this post only shows beaches? Simply because I just love beach holiday :p. Other potential attraction of my beloved Indonesia will be discussed in another post. Bon Weekend!

Checked!

Found the check list somewhere here  and decided to do it. Let's see....


Appearance
[] I have/had piercings besides the ears.
[] I want piercings besides the ears.
[x] I have many scars.
[x] I tan easily.
[x] I wish my hair was a different color.
[] I have friends who have never seen my natural hair color.
[] I have a tattoo.
[x] I can be self-conscious about my appearance.
[x] I have/had braces.
[] I have more than two piercings. 


Embarrassment
[x] Disney movies still make me cry.
[x] I’ve laughed so hard I’ve cried.
[x] I’ve glued my hand to something.
[x] I’ve laughed until some kind of beverage came out of my nose.
[x] I’ve had my pants rip in public. 6th grade. I still hold grudge to the girl who did this
[x] I’ve touched something sharp/hot/etc to see if it would hurt. I know this one's silly but I still do this to the very time to check the temperature of my cooking.


Health
[x] I’ve gotten stitches.
[] I’ve broken a bone.
[] I’ve had my tonsils removed.
[x] I’ve had my wisdom teeth removed.
[] I’ve had serious surgery.
[x] I’ve had chicken pox. Thrice. First time was in my 3th grade. Then when I was in Abu dhabi (2007) and the last time I was in Duri (2009)


Travel
[] I’ve been to Florida.
[x] I’ve been on a plane.
[] I’ve been to UK.
[] I’ve been to Spain.
[] I’ve been to the Caribbean.
Lameeee... Ugh I wanna go to these places...!

Experiences
[x] I’ve gotten lost in my city. I am kinda disoriented. What do you expect??
[] I’ve seen a shooting star.
[] I’ve wished on a shooting star.
[] I’ve seen a meteor shower.
[x] I’ve gone out in public in my pajamas. And worse, to one of the most prestigious mall in Jakarta. Hihi
[] I’ve pushed all the buttons on an elevator.
[x] I’ve slapped someone.
[x] I’ve kissed someone underwater.
[] I’ve gone skinny-dipping.
[x] I’ve chugged something.
[] I’ve been in a car crash. But I've been in Motorcycle crash for too many times :(
[] I’ve been skiing.
[x] I’ve been in a musical. Just last year! Haha!
[x] I’ve auditioned for something.
[x] I’ve been on stage.
[] I’ve caught a snowflake on my tongue.
[x] I’ve sat on a rooftop at night. And lighted up some cigarettes. :p 
[x] I’ve pranked someone.
[x] I’ve ridden in a taxi.


Honesty / Crime
[] I’ve been arrested.
[] I’ve been threatened to be arrested.
[x] I’ve broken a law.
[x] I’ve done something I promised someone I wouldn’t.
[x] I’ve done something I promised myself I wouldn’t.
[x] I’ve snuck out.
[x] I’ve lied about my whereabouts.
[x] I’ve cheated while playing a game.
[x] I’ve been in a fist fight. Only IF high school martial art fighting competition is considered fist fight.


Death
[x] I’m afraid of dying.
[x] I hate funerals.
[x] I’ve seen someone/something die. A lil bird I found in parking lot. Can't stop crying that night
[] Someone close to me has attempted suicide.
[] I’ve thought about suicide before.
[] I’ve written a eulogy for myself. But I am indeed, had thoughts for it. 


Materialism
[] I own a lot of makeup.
[] I own something from Pac Sun.
[x] I own something from The Gap.
[] I own something I got on E-Bay.
[] I own something from Holister.
[x] I'm obsessed with anime/ manga . 
[x] I collected comic books
[x] I thrive on compliments
[x] I thrive on hate
[] I own over 5 rap CD


Random
[x] I can sing low tunes.
[] I’ve stolen a tray from a fast food restaurant.
[] I open up to others easily.
[x] I watch the news.
[] I don’t kill bugs / don’t like to kill them.
[] I'm afraid of bugs/insects. But totally scared of lizards. Eugh
[x] I sing in the shower.
[] I’m a morning person.
[] I’m a sports fanatic.
[x] I twirl my hair.
[x] I care about grammar.
[] I love spam.
[] I’ve copied more than 30 CDs in a day.
[] I bake well
[x] My favorite color is either white, yellow, pink, blue, red, black, purple, or orange.
[x] I would wear pajamas to school. Totally good idea.
[] I like Martha Stewart.
[] I am guilty of tYpInG lIkE tHiS.
[x] I laugh at my own jokes.
[] I eat fast food weekly.
[x] I’ve not turned anything in and still got an A in a certain class.
[] I can’t sleep if there’s a spider in the room.
[x] I like white chocolate.
[x] I bite my nails.
[x] I’m good at remembering faces.
[] I’m good at remembering names.
[x] I’m good at remembering dates.
[] I have no idea what I want to do for the rest of my life.
[x] All my answers were and will be totally honest.


Eating
[x] I’ve lost weight.
[x] I’ve gained weight.
[] I’m at my thinnest.
[x] I’m at my biggest.
[] I’ve lost weight and kept it off.
[x] I’ve lost weight but gained it back.
[] My weight affects my mood.
[] I weigh myself daily.
[x] I’m jealous of everyone skinnier than me.
[] I feel happy when I’m hungry.
[] I get depressed after eating.
[x] I diet.
[] I’m 50% vegan/vegetarian.
[x] I’ve skipped a meal.
[] I’ve thrown food away.
[] I’ve spat food out.
[] I’ve taken diet pills.
[] I’ve used laxatives.
[] I’ve purged.
[x] I exercise.
[x] I exercise so I can eat.
[] I work out daily.
[x] I’ve fainted from exhaustion.


Family
[x] I’ve planned to run away from home before.
[] I’ve run away from home.
[x] My biological parents are together.
[] I have a sibling less than one year old.
[x] I want kids. (some day)
[] I’ve had kids.
[] We’ve lost a child.


Relationships
[x] I’m seing some one
[x] I’m in a relationship.
[] I’m engaged. Hopefully, soon. Ahem to boyfriend. 
[] I’m married. Hopefully, soon. Ahem to boyfriend.
[] I’m a swinger.
[x] I’ve gone on a blind date.
[x] I have/had a friend with benefits.
[x] I’ve hooked up with someone in little or no notice.
[x] I miss someone right now.
[x] I have a fear of abandonment.
[] I’ve physically cheated in a relationship.I use my right NOT to answer :p
[] I’ve mentally cheated in a relationship. I use my right NOT to answer, again :p
[] I’ve gotten divorced.
[x] I’ve had feelings for someone who didn’t have them back.
[x] Someone has had feelings for me when I didn’t have them back.
[x] I’ve told someone I loved them when I didn’t.
[x] I’ve told someone I didn’t love them when I did.
[] I’ve kept something from a past relationship.


Sexuality
[] I’ve had a crush on someone of the same sex.
[x] I’ve had a crush on a teacher.
[x] I’ve been kissed in the rain.
[x] I’ve hugged a stranger
[x] I’ve kissed a stranger. On the cheek. It counts, right?


Bad times
[x] I’ve consumed alcohol.
[] I regularly drink.
[] I can’t swallow pills.
[] I’ve been diagnosed with clinical depression at some point.
[x] I've have/had anxiety problems.
[] I don’t have anyone to talk to when I’m upset.
[] I take anti-depressants.
[x] I’ve slept an entire day before.
[] I’ve hurt (thought about hurting) myself on purpose before.
[] I am / have been addicted to self-harm.
[x] I’ve woken up crying.
[x] I’ve cried myself to sleep.
[x] I’ve plotted revenge.


I’ve done
[] Weed
[] Diet pills
[] Anti-depressants
[] Ecstasy
[] LSD
[] Mushrooms
[] Speed
[] Cocaine
[x] Neither